In church, we’re going through the books of Revelation and Ezekiel. Understandably, the “end times” have been on my mind. This isn’t a new topic for me. If you know anything about my book, A Time to Die, you know I’ve tackled the idea of mortality, finitude, temporarity . . .
I am not afraid to die.
However, I don’t want to die yet. I don’t want to be raptured unless I’m ninety-eight-years-old or older. 🙂 Why? Because I have one chance to be an example of Christ to those who don’t know Him. One chance to live out the calling He has placed on my life:
After this life, I will be dwelling in my inheritance as an adopted child of God. Heaven. There are no tears. No suffering. It will be perfect. It will be pure joy. But I don’t want Heaven yet. (Tweet this)
It would feel as though I received the gold medal without actually running the race.
Perhaps my heart isn’t right. Shouldn’t I want only to be with Christ? I hear this so often, especially regarding the rapture — that we should be holding on and longing for His return. Is that how I should feel?
I don’t feel it. I feel a shrill banshee scream in my mind saying, “NOOO!” I’ve only just fallen deeply in love with Christ. I still have stamina in me. I need to pursue people. I need to risk my life, my comfort . . . for Him.
I want to live as long as humanly possible solely so that He will use me, more fully, to reach His people. I want to be with Him in heaven, but this . . . this life . . . is my one chance to be faithful and obedient. I’ve already wasted years of my life through selfishness, and the moment I step back to look at life through eternal lenses . . . I panic. Because I haven’t done for God what I want to yet.
Don’t get me wrong. This is, in no way, an attempt to earn my way into heaven. We are saved by grace and salvation doesn’t hinge only on my actions. But I want to live a full life for Christ.
This is the only life we have. At most, we have to persevere through one hundred years of imperfection before stepping into eternal rest and perfection. I know I’ll get tired someday. I’ll hit a point where I long for heaven. But it’s already promised to me. So until then, I’ll continue striving. Remember: life demands pursuit and God’s given you the perfect amount of time with which to catch it. (Tweet this)
What about you? Are you ready for Christ to return and take you home?
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